SMALL TALK

Small talk is meaningless conversation in terms of content, but is often seen as socially important in certain situations, or context. In many English-speaking countries, it can be viewed as rude or unfriendly not to make small talk. Non-personal comments about non-controversial subjects are usually considered as appropriate small talk.

Discussing the weather with people who you don't really know is an example of small talk that many of us are very familiar with on a daily basis. We may chat about the weather with the cashier at the supermarket or with the attendant at the gas station. Small talk may also be related to the situation such as waiting in line. People in the line may comment to others about how slow it is in the post office or bank that day, for instance. We also engage in small talk with people we may see every day but don't really know such as those we share the elevator with in our office building.

Small talk is common at parties when guests may know the host but not each other. It is considered rude not to mingle and speak with other guests at social functions, so small talk can break the ice and get guests chatting. Compliments may be a type of small talk such as one woman at party complementing another on her dress. Guests at the buffet table may make small talk about the types of food offered as they place items onto their plates.

Some people like small talk because they find silence uncomfortable and/or they enjoy communicating verbally. Others enjoy meeting new people and use small talk to start conversations. Some people don't like making small talk at all and often dread going to parties at least partly because of it.

There are few tips that should be kept in mind while making small talks. These are :-

1. As you prepare for a function, come up with three things to talk about as well as four generic questions that will get others talking. If you've met the host before, try to remember things about her, such as her passion for a sport or a charity you're both involved in.

2. Be the first to say "hello." If you're not sure the other person will remember you, offer your name to ease the pressure. For example, "Charles Bartlett? Lynn Schmidt... good to see you again." Smile first and always shake hands when you meet someone.

3. Take your time during introductions. Make an extra effort to remember names and use them frequently.

4. Get the other person talking by leading with a common ground statement regarding the event or location and then asking a related open-ended question. For example, "Attendance looks higher than last year, how long have you been coming to these conventions?" You can also ask them about their trip in or how they know the host.

5. Stay focused on your conversational partner by actively listening and giving feedback. Maintain eye contact. Never glance around the room while they are talking to you.

6. Listen more than you talk.

7. Have something interesting to contribute. Keeping abreast of current events and culture will provide you with great conversation builders, leading with "What do you think of...?" Have you heard...?" What is your take on...?" Stay away from negative or controversial topics, and refrain from long-winded stories or giving a lot of detail in casual conversation.

8. If there are people you especially want to meet, one of the best ways to approach them is to be introduced by someone they respect. Ask a mutual friend to do the honors.

9. If someone hands you a business card, accept it as a gift. Hold it in both hands and take a moment to read what is written on it. When you're done, put it away in a shirt pocket, purse or wallet to show it is valued.

10. Watch your body language. People who look ill at ease make others uncomfortable. Act confident and comfortable, even when you're not.

11. Before entering into a conversation that's already in progress, observe and listen. You don't want to squash the dynamics with an unsuited or ill-timed remark.

12. Have a few exit lines ready, so that you can both gracefully move on. For example, "I need to check in with a client over there," "I skipped lunch today, so I need to visit the buffet," or you can offer to refresh their drink.

When should you exit a conversation? According to Susan RoAne, author and speaker known as the "Mingling Maven," your objective in all encounters should be to make a good impression and leave people wanting more. To do that, she advises: "Be bright. Be brief. Be gone."

RAPPORT BUILDING

Whether its a salesperson with customer, manager with
employee, teacher with student or parent with child, rapport
skills are the foundation for successful communications.
As we think of rapport being a degree of harmony that we
have with someone, it takes on powerful dimensions in
developing relationships. And when a person is responsive
to you and your intentions, it could be related to your rapport
skills. And whom do we respond to most favorably? People
who are like us --- in ideas, actions, values, even speaking
patterns. When in Rome, do as the Romans do.

More experienced and successful communicators realize the
impact of maintaining rapport and coming back to regain it,
if its lost. Over the years many rapport skills and techniques
have been used successfully: find something in a customer’s
office that you could comment about to start a conversation that
would let the client know about some common ground,
a solid handshake, good eye contact and the list of rapport
skills goes on.

However there are 5 major ways in which you can maintain and build rapport:

1. Relax—Have Fun!

It is your job to create an environment that is conducive to buying. Pointless, scripted, ice-breaking questions only create a cold selling environment. So relax and have a little bit of fun!

As soon as you meet your prospective customer, you will be evaluated. That evaluation will be determined not just by how you feel, but also how you make your prospect feel. The only way to put your prospect at ease is to be at ease yourself. If you’re uptight and contrived, your prospect will remain guarded and cold. If you are having fun, chances are your prospect will, too!

After all, people buy from people, and your job as a professional communicator (a.k.a. salesperson) is to make your customer comfortable enough to grab a Coke from your refrigerator.

2. Lighten Up, Laugh It Up

Nothing is more powerful than humor when it comes to building rapport quickly with your customer. Laughter is the spark that ignites interest and cordiality between you and your prospect; it’s hard to laugh with a person and not feel comfortable around them.

Some salespeople take their job too seriously, and are so focused on the sale that they forget to think about the customer. So, lighten up! If you make them laugh, they may buy from you!

3. Get to the Point

You got them on the phone, you secured an appointment, and you got them in your store — now get to the point! State your objective and why they should care. Be careful not to use clichéd and insincere reasons like saving money, increasing productivity, and other transparent and ineffective reasons they have heard from so many salespeople before you.

Prospects don’t enjoy wasting time by playing games, and they certainly don’t trust a salesperson that makes them. Being specific will clear the air and will lead to a conversation and relationship that you will both enjoy.

4. Show Humility, but Be Yourself

Salespeople seem to be born with a humility deficiency, which is probably why most prospects don’t like them.

Your prospects think that THEY are the most important person in the world, and they expect to be treated as such. To build rapport quickly, you must learn to put that customer and their needs first, regardless of the size of the sale.

Curb the talk about how your company is the biggest and the best, and skip the part about how your product is superior to all other products in the market. The prospect needs to come to that realization independently, and the only way for that to happen is for you to remain humble.

Being humble doesn’t mean that you have to stifle your uniqueness. It simply means that you must let the prospect see and experience your uniqueness rather than having to hear you talk about it.

5. Be Sincere and Honest

Trust is the foundation for building a relationship with your prospect. You CANNOT fake this! If you are only in it for the commission, it will show! You must be sincere and honest throughout every step of the process to be successful.

Being sincere means believing in yourself, your product, and your company wholeheartedly. It means believing your product or service will benefit the prospect. You must be passionate about wanting to help your prospect and do so in an honest way. Without sincerity and honesty, you have no chance at building the rapport that will lead to loyal business.

When you believe in your heart that your product will have a profound impact on your prospect, it will accompany every word and impression delivered to that person. Your words will be more meaningful and your prospect will be more likely to respond to them.